Why therapy?

For Couples

Does any of this describe your relationship?

  • Your fights leave you feeling frustrated, hurt, disconnected

  • There are way too many things you can’t talk about

  • You used to have an active sex life

  • You used to have fun together

  • There has been an affair, or there are secrets

  • You wonder if your needs will ever be met

  • You’re no longer sure your partner loves you, or maybe that you love them

  • You’re lonely

  • You don’t feel liked

  • The distribution of labor feels really unbalanced

  • Your thoughts, well, they’re a bit of a mess

  • People you trust have told you that you need therapy

  • You keep making the same mistakes over and over

  • You’ve had scary things happen, and you’re not doing well

  • You want to be happier but don’t know how to make it happen

  • Life changes (new job, new baby, new city) are overwhelming

  • It’s time for some new skills

For Individuals

Does any of this sound familiar?

  • You feel sad all the time, freaked out, or unable to cope

  • People keep taking advantage of you, and you don’t know how to make it stop

  • Saying “no” is terrifying

  • Your achievements are good, but your self-confidence doesn’t match

Luckily, there’s a thing for that…

This is what I do in a nutshell - a sample

Couples Therapy (including marital, pre-marital, and unmarried couples)

  • Teach couples how to argue in a way that brings them closer rather than damages trust

  • Move on from past and current hurts (everything from crappy comments about your appearance to an affair to undermining you as a parent)

  • Create rituals as a couple that keep you connected

  • Develop the skills and the confidence to bring up a touchy subject and know you can talk to your partner in a way they can hear

  • Have better sex, and more of it!

  • Know what to do when things go off the rails

  • Keep your friendship strong for years to come

Individual Therapy

  • Teach you how to say “no” without wanting to vomit

  • Feel better about yourself

  • Figure out how to be an adult with your parents

  • Stop people from walking all over you

  • Be more confident (about you, work, relationships)

  • Have more fun and make more friends!

  • Figure out why you feel icky way too often; oh, and fix it so you don’t feel so icky anymore

  • Reduce/eliminate those overly strong reactions to things

  • Teach skills, like coping with your anxiety

  • Reduce those bothersome symptoms (from depression, anxiety, PTSD, etc)

Family Therapy - have a better relationship with your parents, your sibling, your kid

  • Teach you how to talk about disagreements without yelling at each other

  • Negotiate in a way that leads to you getting more of what you want

  • Get past old conflicts that keep coming up, over and over and over

  • Learn how to either 1. make the drama stop, or 2. remove yourself from the drama

  • Unite the “factions” in the family (this does require all the factions to attend, though!)

Discernment Counseling - for when you’re not sure about staying in a relationship

Here’s the real talk: couples therapy doesn’t work if you have serious questions about staying in a relationship. It’s just not that effective when those doubts are in the way.

So, there’s a specific type of counseling, called Discernment Counseling (DC for short), that is designed to help you figure out if you even want to work on it.

DC is not therapy. It’s a way to help each person gain clarity and confidence about making a decision about the future of their relationship. DC is 1-5 sessions and focuses on three possible paths forward: stay together with no change, divorce/break up, or 6 months all-out effort in therapy with divorce/break up off the table.

For more information about the DC process, here’s an article that gives a good description.

Having some DC sessions to resolve these doubts can make couples counseling SOOOOOO much more effective, because both of you are now on board with fixing the relationship.

So out of all the therapists out there, why work with me?

Maybe you don’t

I’m very good at what I do, but I’m not for everyone

  • If the occasional swear word offends you, I’m not for you

  • If you want a therapist who is going to just nod understandingly and occasionally tell you that you’re wonderful, I’m not for you

  • If you want a therapist to fix your partner and give you a pass, I’m not for you

I might be for you if…

  • You are ready for a real change in yourself or your relationship

  • With support and compassion from me, you can hear a bit about what you’re doing that might not be ::ahem:: perfect

  • You’re invested in making your relationship better right now

  • You’re just sick of feeling stuck and enough already

If you think you might be ready, I encourage you to set up a free video consultation with me. Here’s how you can Contact me.

If you want to know more about me, you can find out more here.

And if you want more specific information about the types of therapy I do (including fees), please see the services pages: